Tired

So, its basically T-minus 3 weeks and change until the bar. That to me is no time at all, but then when I hear dates it seems like forever away. I am still tired- I feel like I am crawling at a snail's pace to cover 7 subjects that last summer did NOT take me half the time to cover. I know I am making progress, I just hope to cement everything in time.

Plus, I HAVE TO PASS THIS TIME. I just have to. That's it. I am tired of the embarrassment of not having passed, of not being certified, of having to wait to look for jobs because I didn't pass. Its bleak, and its scary as hell. My roommate got an offer today at our friend's firm, which is great and wonderful for her. I just feel sad that I am so far behind in the job process.

I know I need to stay positive and stay focused. I just do. Things are not so bad. I just need to crack down on myself and keep myself in line with what I want to accomplish and not freak out.

I just hope I remember what I've studied. I think I will, but I just don't know.

I also have TREMENDOUS guilt for leaving work for three weeks to take the test, but it has to be done. I just don't have the luxury to not do it.

I will pass and I will be fine.

I think starting tomorrow I am going to start sticking notecards around my room with various tips and elements of things. I think that makes good sense :)